When I came back to Italy, I was too much engaged by work and other top priority stuff to complete my diary.
So, I postponed it just to make it better.

I will continue to publish it today, dating every post with it’s effective writing date and putting them into the Diary category as I already did before.
The only news is that I’m publishing the photos, so I’m also editing the pages of the diary to link the photos of what I’m talking about.

It’s strange, the difference between languages, the way I express myself in italian, and the way I express myself in English.
I often change everything translating what I write in italian, if I do, and after two weeks that I passed here in Italy It feels so odd to read the diary pages I wrote in English, during my holiday in California.
I feel like if I spoken english in my previous life.

Now I deeper understand the meaning of the words that my chinese friend Jinchuan said to me… when she told me that it was hard for her to express herself even if she known perfectly Italian.
Translating words is not enough, mental schemes also have to be translated, and every language have a culture, so every culture have it’s schemes.

I was also stuck with the publishing of the diary cause I often try to “go the whole hog”, so I was trying to reorganize the pages to make a real report of that holiday with informations about places, people, and a lot of weblinks.
Finally I tought… “damn, I can do it better in my next holiday” …
One of my project for the future is to be a reporter, creating photographic books of the place where I go, and writing about them.

That is common in my life, get stuck on things trying to do them perfectly.
Perfection does not exist.
However, I think it’s so important to do things in the best way I can, and I always try to do that…
… expecially when others can judge my acts.

So I finally arrived to the point… my search for perfection in things is strongly linked to the necessity of being appreciated by others, and that is the reason why from now, I will try to do things imperfectly.

At least, for me now, that’s the only way to get them done.

who’s kidding who with your gods of light and fire?
who’s kidding who with your guns and your souls for hire?
who’s kidding who spouting truth through lips of liars?
who’s kidding me?
who’s kidding you?
who’s kidding who?from the beginning
when your born just a baby
you’re taught how to act
what to say
when your crazy
and told be good
don’t be lazy
or you’ll go straight to hell for your sins

who’s kidding who with your gods of light and fire?
who’s kidding who with your guns and your souls for hire?
who’s kidding who spouting truth through lips of liars?
who’s kidding me?
who’s kidding you?
who’s kidding who?

now when I stop and think
what we are doing
who’s getting killed
who’s making a killing
people scratching for food
living in ruin
just makes no sense

who’s kidding who with your gods of light and fire?
who’s kidding who with your guns and your souls for hire?
who’s kidding who spouting truth through lips of liars?
who’s kidding me?
who’s kidding you?
who’s kidding who?

how long will we close our eyes
cover our ears and numb our minds
with all the tv’s scripted lies
fed with fear till we deny
there’s blood and greed in every bite
of the pie?

who’s kidding who with your gods of light and fire?
who’s kidding who with your guns and your souls for hire?
who’s kidding who spouting truth through lips of liars?
who’s kidding me?
who’s kidding you?
who’s kidding who?

I couldn’t make colors match today
I don’t know what else to say
except I tried and they can’t say I didn’t
I don’t like the stuff they are feeding me
they don’t like the things I say
but I don’t think I need to be forgivenBut I am quiet inside
though they drag me by a wire
through the storm that cracks the sky
I am quiet inside

I used to be so hard to find
rage and tears filled my eyes
but now i believe I see much clearer
my clarity did not come easily
my cell was knocked into me
but now at least I know who’s in the mirror

I am quiet inside
though they drag me by a wire
through the storms that cracks the sky
I am quiet inside

I am quiet inside
though they drag me by a wire
through the storms that cracks the sky
I am quiet inside

yeah I’m quiet inside
I am quiet

I couldn’t make colors match today
I don’t know what else to say

When the river calls my name
angels are afraid
the song I heard before
Words washed upon the show

Than the crackles passing back
ride into the sky
so happy all the way
all I wonder … how it feels

Fly…
way up in those skies
just spread your wings,
leave this earth behind

Now If I can hang my way
only for a day
I set upon the moon
whistles in a thumb

than I come and pass his back
I will hitch a ride
to the nearest galaxy
all I wonder … how it feels

To fly…
way up in those sky
spread your wings
leave this earth behind

and when I’m in the dark
and breeze in by the stars
they sing a lullabye
they comes by restless heart

And I… know
How it feels…
… to fly.

Way up in those skies
spread your wings
leave it all behind…

… and leave it all behind …
… leave it all behind.

The return was horrible.

Work started the day after my landing without giving me any chance to get used to it.

The jet lag killed me, I sleeped 4 hours for this entire week, and several causes of stress added up all toghether.

Fortunately, the week ended with a success at work, and work is so important to me cause it proves myself every day that I can do good things, giving me a lot of satisfactions.

However, when I close my eyes, at night, I still think to her like I did before leaving.

But there is something different.
This time, I feel that I really want to leave it all behind.
I fall asleep listening Andy Tubman’s Lullaby.

I open my eyes, the childrens are looking me.
I stop to write, and I dedicate myself to the organization of the trip.
This time, the camera is fully recharged. And I got a map too.

I was lifted by Scott (my sister’s husband) to Venice Beach, where I walked all the morning.
Here, people is so nice and strange.
Venice Beach is just a place along the end of Los Angeles beach where a rich american in love with Venice, tryed to create something similar with artificial canals and a lot of money.

There, I saw the ocean for the first time in my life, and I drenched my foots into it.
I didn’t cry. That surprised me.
I’m becoming a big kid.

I started from the long hike that coasts the ocean.
After a long The hot and warm weather leaves space for the homeless to rest in the streets allowing strange tales about them to spread.

They share the same destiny, their kind with each other, gambling for food and beer with their oddities.

In this trip, I didn’t stop to look at person’s thoughts, I just gone straight cause I had too few time.
However, I known three.

The first was a photographer, Victor Spencer.

I was very surprised by his works.
He got a really amazing arsenal of photos on his portfolio, but he still not have a website.
I offered myself to create him one, and he kindly gifted me two prints he made from his photos.
I sold myself as a newbye but well promising photographer.
I hope I did well.
I would have talked to Victor for the entire day, but my road was long and we already exchanged our email addresses.

So my walk started again, in the direction of the canals.
On both sides of the road, strange stands with every kind of oddity and useless stuff.
On my right, the ocean, with huge palms, and some courts to play basketball and similar sports.
I also dressed myself with a python and get some photos of me with it for some coins.

A lot of things captured my attentions…
Like the illusory potraits of Octavio Ocampo, a visionary Mexican painter…

or the strange puppets done with recycled metallic crap by this guy:

I also did one of the best photos of that day to a weird person dressed like the building he was resting on.

Again, I showed to myself that my idea of photography is more “keeping eye on beauty” than “beauty things”.

Just after that I known the second person, Sam, a Jamaican boy that bringed me to the canals.

He found me very funny.
I asked him if he was white skinned before starting to walk on that road, cause he was not wearing a shirt and I was burning under that sun. The temperature was 41° Centigrades. The sun was in the middle of the sky.
Hot. But so dry, so I was ok.

While I was walking and talking with Sam I known also some italians guys

that known him in one of the last (and probably more expensive) houses of the beach.
I didn’t liked them, however I pretended to, so I did them some photos, while they was holding the original Venice flag.
Of course I forgot about them just turning the corner.

There, I greeted him cause our roads was going to divide.
My journey bringed me to the center of the city… and I saw there that Venice Beach sucks.
It’s just a huge quarter with some artificial canals, linked by some terrible white painted wood bridges.
Just to have an idea… that is a photo that survived my deleting-rage.

Some houses was cute… however… they remembered me an Ultima Online’s city, were every owner of a small tent is encouraged to create a house how he wants chosing from infinite different ornamentation.
The result, is a chaos with no style, and also no logic, in wich the only common thing is the will of “have some fun”.
That is also, indeed, the spirit I found in most part of the USA, especially in Los Angeles.

A little frustrated about that place, I remembered that I still haven’t had a breakfast, and it was already afternoon.
I started to walk the path back, also buying a hoop of mango from a mexican old women and drinking a lemon-strawberry juice.
It’s amazing to recognize in each building, and everywere I look, a place I already saw in television.

On my way back, I also changed road, passing near the HenHouse recording studio where Andy Tubman recorded his first CD with the band he created a few time ago, the Jane Doe’s.
This is a video about them and the recording studio.
I will make an entire article about him/them cause I think that he is a genious and I really like his style too.
The next time I will be in California I want to go at their concerts.

On the road back, I known the third person, a Hare Krishna monk that was so kind with me.
I showed him so much interest even if I was in a big hurry, so he gifted me some books that I still have to read fearing what I can find inside them. But I will.
I didn’t made photos to him, just for respect of his spirituality.

After I came back to the place I was lifted in the morning, I was carried again from Scott to his father’s house.
I passed the rest of the day with the family.

We did a big barbecue in pure american style, I played a lot with the childrens in the swimming pool.
I like Scott’s family, and I’ll see them with pleasure in the future.

That was my last day in Los Angeles, and that made me be a little sad.
The darkness came fast to cool my excitement, and the night passed fast too.

Los Angeles… I will return.

I open my eyes, and I see New York.

The light, is coming from the window.
It’s dawn, and all is so silent.
I ask myself where in the hell I am.

I was confused, with a big hedache.
That was my first night of full sleep after three days.
After some minutes, my brain started to work again.
“Finally, I’m thinking in English”, I thought.
I smiled.

I wandered around the house like a cat putted in a room he don’t knows, amazed by it.
That was Los Angeles, Santa Monica.
One hour of walk from the ocean, the houses have Spanish colonial architecture. I did some nice photos carefully shutting down the camera at every shot.

The gardens was very big, nice structure.
A wonderful house… it smells of culture.
In the library I see a lot of books about cooking, Italy, and various kinds of art.
I took one about Magritte.

I never taked some time to understand Magritte, but after that day I like it so much.
The research of silence.
In a world like this, it is one of the most important things.
I always had respect for silence, I like to hear it, I like to make it.

But after some wandering, I heard some noises, and I jump back into my bed like a ninja guilty of being spotted with the knife out of the sheath.
Some minutes, revealed me the sad truth.
“I’m in the goddamn GameCube room”, I thought.

I waked up, saluting the childrens and letting them play with the fucking console.
I was nervous because they remembered me about my battery. They wasn’t caring about that.

After some animated family discussions on what to do, we moved to a cafe’ in the city center to eat something.
The breakfast was great, even if I missed some shots.
I was getting angry, being in a city like that without my digital camera.

After that, we moved to the famous 3rd road that was my first place to explore in Los Angeles.
In the road, we stopped in a RadioShack, the famous chain of electronics shops.
There I was able to recharge a little the camera (for 20 minutes) after I finally bough a transformer.

So I did some photos, during the trip, to the strange and amazing structures of that part of the city.
Los Angeles is really big.
There are no skyscrapers, due to the high frequency of earthquakes, and all the structures are well and modernly designed.

They leaved me there, on the 3rd road.
A huge street created only for pedestrians, without cars, just a street before the ocean (the ocean is the first street).
But the camera was still out of battery… DAMN IT
I did my last 4 shots, feeling like John Wayne in a western film with the last bullets.
After some patrolling, I went to the biggest and less-warded shop of the zone: a library.
There, on the last floor, I was able to plug my camera with it’s new recharger to a socket on the wall.

So, while I was searching for a chair, I saw a ledge with a nice panorama of the 3rd road.
On it, a curious sign:

“please do not sit or lie on this ledge”.

So, I sprawled on it for a while, with my pen and my pieces of paper, and I wrote this notes down, trying to be sincere.

After an hour, I started to read some Dungeons & Dragons (Forgotten Realms) novels and knowing an interesting person whose name was Samuel M. Smith.
Samuel, also suggested me to read a book of Stephen King about writing: “On Writing“, that I’m reading carefully.
I like to share my experiences with other and to get some from them. Also I tought that an english reading would be good for practice.

On that library I also bought the nice moleskine I use now to write my diary.
Before that moment, I was just using pieces of paper that were starting to confuse me.

It was funny that paying the stuff, I coined the phrase “Bye, and sorry for the Mess”.
That day, I always did a lot of mess when paying stuff or just looking for it.
I was always inclined to say to everyone I’m Italian, just to look more pleasing, and that always worked (avoiding to foolish myself or just to be kicked out by the wards).

Everyone looks so nice with Italians here, and there is more Italian stuff here than in Italy.

Another thing that astonished me, was a Lush shop in the 3rd road.
I bought some funny things in the Lush of Venice, just a week or two before.

I spent the rest of the morning to wander on the 3rd road, and to do photos to the artists on the road.

The second one is Chelsea Williams, she was very cute… I bought a CD.

After that I went to the meeting place, to be lifted up for the dinner.
In the afternoon, I played with my nephews in the pool of an amazing luxury apartment building and I known the family of my sister’s husband.

We also did a barbecue in pure american style.
I like them, and I’m starting to feel good here in the USA.

Yeah, after a full day of travel (I don’t know what time my brain thinks it is) I’m going to Los Angeles with the family, by car.
My head is like a railway wreck, I sleep four hours and I’m starving too. But that’s ok.
The only think I know, is that the battery of my digital camera is starving too. And that makes me nervous.

When I completely woke up I wandered a little around the house, it’s beautiful.
My sister said me that John Lennon lived here for a while, there’s also a small writing he did in the bathroom (probably inspired by the smell of his shit).

My nephews greets me. I love them.

After some re-equipment, and a fast lunch, we was ready to go.
Three days in Los Angeles were waiting me.

The trip takes, by car, 7 hours.
During it, I listened (I was ahead and there was no screen) Star Trek 1, 2 and 3 … that was good cause it taked me away from my thoughts.
I also like science fiction films, and in Star Trek, there is always some space for philosophy too.

The California state is really big.
And it’s beautiful too to “live” it by car, travelling.
The temperature outside is 41° Centigrades, but the air is dry so it is ok.
The mainland sometimes arrives to 45°, only the coast is cooler because of the ocean, and in the night the range is always big cause it gets so cold.

During the travel, I did some photos (neraly) finishing my digital camera’s battery.
I taked some shots on pinwheels for energy productions and fields of various kinds of alimentary vegetables.
This part of the USA product huge amounts of food, like the 80% of garlic, and also more than a half of apricots, prickly pears, and so on.

Also a huge amount of cows are raised here.
It was so funny, that my sister’s daughter Anna, opened the car’s window for 3 seconds (the time for Scott, his husband, to close it), and the smell of shit surrounded us for more than 10 minutes.
The cows was at least 600 meters from us… but the smell was in the entire zone and, the most strange thing, is that there was a town just 3 miles after.
It’s name is Cattleman, and someone said that the houses are very cheap ;)

I also saw some oil pumps and tubes, it seems that California is all-sufficient about refueling.
Also a lot of aeolic generators are used to action the oil pumps.

I also did some amazing photos to my first Californian sunset:

When we arrived to Los Angeles the sun was already gone, so my camera was useless.
I have to buy a reflex with a big objective to take more light, sometimes I suck just to do some indoors shots.
The eye habits fast in low-light situations, but for a digital camera, that is a concrete obstacle.

I was astonished by Santa Monica, they said me it’s the best part of Los Angeles.
The houses was all lightened and their gardens was all really beautiful.
The weather allows every kind of vegetation to grow the double as it is used to, with half of the time.

The house was amazing, and the family too.
I was so tired, so I just complained about my digital camera’s battery, eated the dinner, drinked the wine, and fainted on the bed.
Over me, a huge poster of New York that was covering all the wall.